This is a collaborative post

Ok I admit it. I watch too much children’s TV. When myself and my partner spent hours searching for the best deals on televisions, this wasn’t quite what we had in mind. Gone are the days of Game of Thrones and The Sopranos, only for them to be replaced with Peppa Pig, Paw Patrol and Shimmer & Shine. However recently I’ve started to worry that I’m over thinking things…

You know you watch too much children’s tv when…

  • You worry that the relationship between Mayor Goodwin and her pet chicken is somewhat unhealthy….
  • You wonder where Ryder’s parents are and whether being raised by a family of talking pups would be classed as somewhat of a safeguarding issue.
  • You go to bed with ‘pup pup boogie’ song going round your head on repeat. This or the equally annoying Bing bong song from Peppa Pig.

  • You wonder what exactly the words are that Shimmer and Shine are singing, but hear the words ‘boobs are Amay-ay-ay-aze. The song has now become your breast feeding mantra.

  • You start to worry about Miss Rabbit, who is quite clearly breaching the Working Time Regulations nor taking adequate rest breaks in between her various different types of employment. HR hat is firmly concerned on this one.
  • You find yourself quoting ‘if you jump in muddy puddles…..’ before every single visit to the park, then curse Peppa and her stupid hobby when wiping mud out of your child’s eyes, mouth and nose.
  • You find yourself wondering how much the Milkshake presenters get paid, and whether it is enough to compensate for the fact that their cheek muscles must be in a permanent state of spasm from too much smiling. You think you see a glint of sadness behind Derek’s eyes, and worry that his friends may be picking on him in the pub.
  • You leave for work 5 minutes later than you should because you secretly want to know whether Noddy solves his secret mission. You then wonder on the drive to work when exactly it was that he became a secret agent.
  • You sing along to the Thomas the Tank Engine theme tune before muttering something along the lines of ‘changed since my day’ ‘nothing wrong with the original’ and ‘hmph’
  • You pay an obscene Amount of money for Sky Q to enable you to record 7 channels at a time and then realise the majority of your planner is filled with re runs of peppa pig, Disney movies and the occasional episode of angelina ballerina.
  • You *may* have forced your child to watch Tom Hardys Bedtime story episodes more times than strictly necessary, despite the story being ‘a bit boring’ and your child begging to watch another.

  • You cannot hear anything other than the words ‘sack and crack’ when the Zack and Quack theme tune starts to play. You then wonder whether this choice of name was intentional to keep parents everywhere entertained.

Are you guilty of watching more children’s tv than you should?? What other signs have you seen?