Our Dietitian Journey Begins…

If you read my blog regularly, you will know that we have had our fair share of challenges with Neve’s weaning journey. Behind the smiles and those HUGE blue eyes, life has been a little tough.

Neve turns one next week, and at present, she still relies heavily on breast milk and stage one puree’s to get her through the day. Because she eats very little, she is ravenous during the night, resulting in regular wake ups, and frequent night feeds to make up for her lost calorie intake. Not only does she have the strongest gag reflex known to man, but the worst eczema flair ups I have ever seen. I have suspected allergies for some time, but for now, we are trying to get her skin under control with a wide array of prescribed creams and ointments.

We have been waiting for weeks for our first Dietitian appointment, and I have to admit I’d attached more hope to this appointment than perhaps I should have.

The date finally came around this week and we went, and left about 30 minutes later, being no better off than when we arrived.

I’m not sure what I was expecting – some kind of miracle perhaps?

There was a small part of me that wanted something tangible to take away – a physical scan to check nothing is causing her gagging, a referral to a kinesiologist for allergy testing, a checklist of foods to try that are easier first options for a child who struggles with texture. Something. Anything!

The lady was lovely. Please don’t get me wrong. She was friendly and sympathetic. But the messages were all the same ones I have heard a million times before.

“You just need to persevere” – I do.

“She could do with more protein and meat in her diet”. – I’m aware of that, thanks Sherlock.

“Her weight is good so you don’t need to worry” – That’s because she is draining me dry every single night, leaving me sleep deprived and moody.

Yes she is chunky and round with lots and lots of rolls. But she breast feeds like a newborn – otherwise living on fruit and carrot. Hardly slow release calories are they?!

Then we have the nights when she just. won’t. sleep. The riffing, the scratching at her arms, the itchy skin clearly driving her insane as she tries to get comfortable in her bed.

My gut tells me this isn’t normal, but for now, I just need to persevere.

I am doing my own investigations in the meantime, making small changes to my own diet and keeping a note of what I’ve ate and how she has slept / how her skin is. There may well not be a link, but whilst I am feeding her myself, there is of course a possibility that something in my own diet is causing her flair ups, and that some kind of allergy exists. It may end up being a dead end, but I have to try and rule it out if nothing else.

To make things even more challenging, I am having to try and drop the daytime feeds. I return to work in just over a months time, and she can only last till about 2.30/3pm before the inconsolable crying starts. Nursery are doing their best to help me, but this, coupled with her feeding issues makes settling in tough.

Tomorrow is Erin’s leavers assembly. Her last day ever at nursery and in order for me to see it all, I need Neve to cope without me for just one day. I have expressed some milk in the hope that she can cope until 4pm, but I am already feeling anxious at the prospect.

There may be an element of being cruel to be kind. I know she doesn’t “need” the daytime milk anymore and that she can cope without me if she has to.

But when it comes to the crunch… we just need to persevere.