Looking after my Mental Health during Lockdown

This is a collaborative post

Those of you that follow me regularly will know that I have had my fair share of ups and downs on the mental health front. In particular, I have emetophobia (a fear of vomit) and health anxiety, which got worse a couple of years ago after I lost my Mum to cancer and had sepsis after the birth of my second child. After having CBT and support to manage the way I deal with what my therapist termed ‘localised panic disorder’ and health anxiety, I managed to get the symptoms relatively under control. I would get certain days where my anxiety was high, normally at certain points in my cycle, or around specific events related to my own health or that of someone I love. When I had a melanoma in situ removed this time last year, I had another bout of quite severe anxiety, but I was able to rationalise it – no one would be completely calm in that situation.

12 months on, and we are living in the middle of a global pandemic. Contagion, The Day after Tomorrow, 28 Days Later, at times I feel like I’ve woken up in the middle of some low budget sci fi movie that I didn’t quite sign up to. Like its all some kind of weird dream, and that tomorrow I will wake up realising I’ve slept in and missed the school run. Except its not. Its real. I know many people, even those who are normally calm and controlled in the face of adversity have felt anxious and struggled to sleep over the last few weeks, so as someone with health anxiety, it was fairly obvious this wasn’t going to be plain sailing, especially when worrying about symptoms and illness is one of the things I do best!

That said, 5 weeks in, I have found some small steps that have really helped my mental health and anxiety levels over recent weeks, and thought it would be useful to share in case anyone is struggling or in the same boat! For more information on the coronavirus and how it is affecting mental health, check out BetterHelp.com

Limiting my screen time – During the first few weeks of lockdown I found that I was online ALL the time. Reading every single news article, all the latest stats and trends, every breaking news announcement and every tabloid conspiracy. The fake news, the scaremongering and the constant barrage of information was just too much. When it came to bedtime, my mind would be racing and I couldn’t sleep at all. I cried a lot and I was scared. I now try and limit how much of the news I watch and what I read on social media. I have muted a LOT of pages that I follow, because I found that their posts did nothing but heighten my anxiety. I also set up the Corona Lockdown Parents Activity Support Group on Facebook, as I wanted to create a safe place where people could be connected and share activities with other parents, without any of the negativity and stress created with main stream media. The group really took off, and now has 52,000 members! Insane!
Choose my sources carefully – I would consider myself a fairly logical person, and even though in the past I would know full well to take the Daily Express EXTREME WEATHER forecasts with a pinch of salt and that the Daily Mail and The Sun have a tendency to elaborate the truth, I would still find myself clicking on all the click bait and every conspiracy theory going. I now limit my coronavirus news to official source such as the government briefings and information from WHO, knowing that these sources are far more likely to reflect the accurate situation in hand, as depressing or hard to hear as it may be.
Stay Connected – Whilst I want to limit the amount of social media use, it’s also been important to stay connected with loved ones, particularly my Dad and Aunty who both live alone and fall into the vulnerable category. Seeing them on face time, or even having a family game of bingo or a virtual pub quiz via zoom as well as face to face contact with work colleagues can really help and reassure me that theyre coping ok,
Exercise – This was a really difficult one for me. For the first 4 weeks I didn’t leave the house AT ALL. With health anxiety, obviously the prospect of someone coming too close, or coming into contact with someone who (even unknowingly) was poorly was enough to make me want to hibernate for the long haul! However, in the weeks prior to the coronavirus outbreak I had just completed couch to 5k and had been running 30 minutes 3 times a week. I missed the me time that the running gave me, and I was gutted that I might lose everything I had worked so hard to build up. This week, I have now been out 3 times over the last week, and am now trying to build back up to 5k distances 3 or 4 times in 7 days. Going out early in the morning when the roads are quiet and the places deserted is actually hugely calming and has really boosted my mood. The few people I have seen have been socially distancing really well, so I hope to continue taking advantage of our daily exercise right for as long as we have it.
Eat Well – As someone who works from home fairly regularly (albeit usually without kids!) I know how tricky it can be to cope when the fridge is RIGHT there!! However, it’s also important during lockdown not to be tempted to just eat snacks and biscuits all day. With the exception of my Pepsi Max addiction (which appears to be coming back with a vengeance!) I have tried where possible to stick to my three meals a day. Mikes been cooking up some batch meals which we can freeze, meaning the fresh food that we do get goes much further. I am loving the fact were being much more careful about reducing food waste too, and the meal planner in my kitchen is finally getting some use!
Get Dressed! – Again, this might sound like a really weird one but as tempting as it may be to stay in your loungewear or pyjamas for the entire day, getting dressed and making yourself look at least semi normal is, I think, quite important for your mental health. Ive not been going so far as to put on make up or style my hair as normal, but showering and putting on a dress / jeans and top has made me feel much more human!
Distraction – I’ve never been one to fully manage mindfulness and meditation – I struggle to completely switch off and find that with all the will in the world, I always have something to think about. That said, I have found that reading a book, doing a bit of embroidery or colouring in (I am loving the draw with Rob Biddulph sessions) has shifted my focus and made my attention switch to something a bit more creative. Whilst I’m focusing on doing these creative tasks, my mind can’t wander to scary thoughts – and that has to be a huge positive.
Remember I am not a teacher – I have very quickly learnt and been reminded on many occasions that I am not, and not will I ever be, a teacher. At the beginning of lockdown I was attempting to keep to a similar routine as school, doing ‘work’ between 9 and 3. There was lots of moaning, lots of stress and quite frankly, none of us were enjoying it. I’ve lowered my expectations, accepted that this is not a normal situation, and am now just doing what I can. I am also bringing in educational elements to fun activities, like board games, growing plants, baking and craft, whatever I can realistically achieve around my job, which I am now working across 5 days from home. The recent addition of BBC Bitesize and National Academy has been a huge help – bringing back a bit of structure with real teachers.
Find the positives – Whilst its easy to say we’re all stuck at home, I’ve been reminding myself how lucky we are that unlike some of our relatives, we can help save people by quite literally doing nothing. We are safe at home, we have our immediate family all together, and we are lucky that we live in a time where we have technology to help us stay in touch. We can see more of our children and spend time together that we otherwise wouldn’t get, we don’t have to do the dreaded school run, and seeing random acts of kindness and the sense of community that has been shown over recent weeks has been really humbling. The solidarity and sense of togetherness whilst clapping for our carers on a Thursday evening has very quickly become the highlight of my girls’ week.
Be kind to yourself – Last but not least, we all need to be kind to ourselves. I’ve had good days and bad days, days which I have enjoyed and days where I have felt absolutely heartbroken. Accepting that these ups and downs are to be expected is really important. No one is going to feel totally ok with this situation, as its not a normal experience for any of us. Don’t beat yourself up if you struggle. We all will occasionally. What’s important is you recognise when you need a break, and do something to help yourself where you can, even if it’s an early night.